Death of a small boy

It was barely dark last night when I first heard what I thought was one of the single boy’s radios.  They have a tape that they play a lot lately that sounds rather gray and mournful and at first, that’s what I thought I heard.  Then a bit later, I heard my ‘sister’s (Imi’s) mourning wail.  Unfortunately we’ve heard the death wail enough to know who’s is who’s. Sad but true.  Once I heard that, I knew it wasn’t a radio but truly death had come again to Wabuku.  The fact that others were still siting in their houses and it was a single wailing I heard, I figured that it was a baby that had died as opposed to an adult or even toddler.  A baby boy that was born the first or second week of this teaching phase we’re in had died.  He didn’t really have a name yet, he was too young for them to officially assign a name to him.  It’s Komnawe’s baby boy, her last child with her husband Wobre.  Now Wobre is still alive but his second wife, that Komnawe fought with most of the time, Awe, killed herself a few weeks before we started teaching.  She has been blamed for Awe’s decision. The two of them fought – Awe was the more abrasive personality of the two.  She was a loud mouth and fought with her previous husband all the time before he died.  But because these two ladies fought, it was Komnawe’s fault that Awe chose to kill herself to get her ultimate revenge on the other wife and her husband.  Wobre’s been in Vanimo, the closest town that our guys can walk to, for the last three months basically. He came back last week with all kinds of plans to get another wife from a different region of PNG so that he can get his baby back from the other village. Anyway, it’s a complicated mess – and now his son is dead.  He seemed to get the village cold or bronchitis or perhaps even pneumonia earlier last week and although he was short-winded, he looked fine and was breast feeding well until yesterday.  My coworkers gave her medicine for him on Friday but even still, he was so young, not sure if it would really do any good or not.  But then last night he died.  No one else cried – the child wasn’t really old enough for anyone besides the immediate family to mourn for him. We wondered if we should cancel the teaching this morning and yet knew from history that a 3 month old baby doesn’t garner much sympathy here – it’s far too common for them to die at that age or younger. 

We could hear the mother crying this morning after the first tree gong was hit, but still no one else.  As we gathered at the teaching house, her nephew and oldest son were digging the burial hole underneath her brother’s new house.  They made a little platform of sorts in the bottom to put the body and another platform above so the baby would lie in between the two pieces of flooring.  Once they got it just right, the brother carried the baby wrapped in a piece of tree bark (soft and moldable that they use for their baskets, etc.) and the mom came behind him and threw herself on the dirt, still crying.  No one else shed a tear or cried or anything…they covered the baby with dirt and said it was done….time to go listen to God’s Word. 

 

So we walked the few feet over to the teaching house, waited for a few of the folks to come back that had wandered off and dove into the next lesson.  At first, the mother still lay under the house crying….I could hardly hold back the tears.  I just about can’t stand to see anybody cry anyway – I’m that person that cries in the movies and every time my pastor gets choked up…..and apart from that, this woman had lost her child.  The village thinks it’s her fault because she sinned, she didn’t sit well with this other lady and so now God is paying her back.  I couldn’t help but wonder if she feels anything but condemned and lost and alone.  This was the last tie to keep her husband close to her – apart from the other six kids that they have together (that he’s ignoring). The father is downriver.  He left yesterday morning to go down and shake hands with his dead wife’s sister who is caring, and keeping his child.  She’s sick and in their world, he needs to shake hands to indicate that there’s no dispute there or hard feelings – that will make her well – since disharmony is what brings sickness and death and sorcery.  So he’s gone down to straighten that out and his son here died.  As far as we know, he doesn’t know yet.  A canoe came through and we’ve sent word down but haven’t seen him yet. 

 

After all these weeks of teaching, they’re still combining their ancestral customs with the truth they’ve heard.  So sad…but that’s what we’re here for – to bring light and truth into this little corner of the world.  Everyone was there this morning apart from her.  Chances are that she won’t come to the teaching this week – when she’s heard so much of it.  Pray that God would do a work in her life to bring her to the lessons – especially on Wednesday.  Pray for wisdom and opportunity for me to encourage her and share His love for her with her.